Vicious Circle
Vicious Circle
Sadhana opened the door to her daughter Gauri's room and stepped
inside. A kind of sad, hopeless silence filled her mind. It had been fifteen
days to Gauri’s demise. Sadhana opened her closet. With that, memories of Gauri
flashed in her mind. She let out her tears. The question had been harassing her
again and again "At the early age of seventeen, what happened exactly,
that Gauri wanted to end herself?"
Taking a close look at the neatly draped garments, she opened the drawer beneath. The drawer contained Gauri's hairpins, bands, and other accessories along with a diary. She picked up the diary and overlooked its pages. In the diary, Gauri had made some notes by date. Sitting in a nearby chair, Sadhana began to read.
30/03/2018
Today is very boring. I even don’t have the mood to study. It seems
that Mom may be late. What will she do? Due to year endings, she will have more
work in the bank. If Dad would have been there, Mom would not have to do so
much work. She works at home, in her office, managing my college hours. The
only dream she has is that I should study and achieve something. And I will
fulfill her dream. I will now open Facebook for a while to pass my time.
31/03/2018
Yesterday, Sahil sent a friend request on Facebook. I don't even know
him. Mom says that I must not accept strangers’ friend requests. But he looks
damn handsome in his profile photo! I couldn’t resist myself and accepted his
request.
01/04/2018
After studying today, I had a long chat with Sahil on Facebook
Messenger. He is damn interesting. I enjoyed a lot chatting with him.
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02/04/2018 While chatting
today, Sahil and I exchanged cell numbers. He immediately called me. He
sounds like a bollywood hero. I know, Mom wouldn't like it at all but I won’t
talk with him often. 04/04/2018 Yesterday I just
studied. I didn’t even touch the cell phone. In fact, class 11th exams are
over. But 12th classes have already started. I decided to study hard for 12th
right from the beginning. Well, I want to perceive medicine after 12th.
That's what mom wants too. Even today, I am controlling myself. If I go on
Facebook, then it takes too much time as Sahil is always online. I feel
guilty as Mom won’t like it and It’s a waste of study time. But how to resist
myself? Okay, I will just go and see whether he’s online? If so, I’ll have
chat with him only for five to ten minutes. 05/04/2018 I opened Facebook
yesterday, as usual Sahil was online. I decided to chat for five to ten
minutes, But I didn’t realize how an hour and a half passed away! Half an hour ago, he made a video call. He
seems quite older than he is on his FB profile. He is twenty-one years old,
but so handsome! Cool and soft spoken too. He is willing to meet me at the
CCD on JM Road next Sunday. I would love to meet him. 08/04/2018 Today we met in
CCD. We had a long chat. His parents are from Nagar. He lives here in Pune,
sharing a flat with three friends. He is studying in Third year of
engineering. His passionate look about me went deep inside me. While he was
speaking, he touched my hand and lightning flashed all over my body. I should
confess that I love him. Yes… I'm in love with him! 14/04/2018 Nowadays I don’t
even find time to write. Not even for study. I have not given any single
class test this week. Only thing I remember is Sahil…. Sahil and just Sahil.
Nothing else. We chat; make phone calls, video calls. I spend the rest of
time with his thoughts. We met twice this week. And now we are meeting
tomorrow at his apartment. 16/04/2018
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25/05/2018
Oh god! How could He do this to me? He is a big cheater! My eyes are on fire today. My body’s private parts hurt a lot too. Today, Sahil with his friends physically exploited me. I am disgraced. I resisted, but he threatened me saying that He’ll send the video to my mother and upload it to the porn site too. Oh my god where am I stuck? How do I get out of this now? Don't want to tell all this to Mom as she feels very bad.
15/06/2018
In the last few days my body and soul has undergone with an awful trauma. Often Sahil and his three friends tortured me and broke my body's resilience. They show me dirty porn videos and get me to do the same. If I deny, they threaten to make those videos viral.
I should have listened to Mom and should not have accepted stranger Sahil’s friend request. The today’s scenario would be totally different. My life would be as straightforward as it used to be. Mom, my friends and my study was once my world. It was so secured and cool. I am responsible for my pitiable condition. I ignored everything good of my life and got stuck in this vicious circle. Now, to stop all this, there is only way; that is to end this disgusting life. Forgive me mom, but there seems to be no other way.
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Sadhana closed the diary. With Gauri's memory and the horrors she had experienced, she started crying. She decided to teach Sahil a lesson. She remembered that her friend and colleague Chita’s brother Vijay was in-charge of Pune Cyber cell. She called Chitra and requested her to get a meeting with
his brother Vijay. The next day, Sadhana and Chitra came to Vijay's office.
Sadhana brought Gauri's diary and mobile phone. Sadhana told Vijay all the
facts and requested to investigate the case as soon as possible. Inspector
Vijay comforted her that he will personally deal with this matter as soon as
possible. |
Inspector Vijay first cracked Gauri's mobile password with a cyber security officer in his cell. Then He traced the IP address of the messages from Sahil on Facebook Messenger. Soon he found that location, within a month, Pune police traced and arrested Sahil and his three friends.
With Gauri’s untimely death, Sadhana was completely alone. Everything was meaningless for her. But seeing the demon behind bars, which was responsible for Gauri's suicide, she got some degree of justice for Gauri.
©Kavita Datar
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